Welcome To The Harem
Secret Admirer by KristenK2 Part 1 of 2
Summary: Kimberly's got a secret admirer. Schmoop alert.
TITLE: Secret Admirer AUTHOR: Kristen K2 SUMMARY: Kimberly's got a secret admirer. Schmoop alert. LEGAL DISCLAIMER: Nobody in this story (hail, hail, the gang's all here) belongs to me, except Emma and Andy the Pandy. They belong to CC, Fox and 1013; I just borrowed them for a little bit. The use of these characters is not for profit or any other form of compensation. I also swiped a poem from Maya Angelou, but I think it's worth borrowing. CATEGORY: Skinner/Other Romance SPOILERS: All up to Requiem. This was written before Season 8 started, so in this story, there's no Doggett, and Mulder came back unharmed, I don't know how. NOTES: Beta-free for your viewing enjoyment. E-MAIL ADDRESS: KristenK2@deslea.com RATING: NC-17 Kim didn't know what to think when she walked into her office that first Monday morning. She'd come in a bit early, which was unusual for her. Mornings were always the most difficult; between feeding and bathing and showering and getting dressed and making lunches for both herself and Emma, the hands on the clock moved much faster than the two attached to her arms. Didn't matter how early or late she woke up either; it was always a race to the finish line. But she made up for her frequent tardiness by pulling lots of late nights. Her mom took Emma in after day care closed at 5, so Kim could stay as late as needed. And she often did; the overtime money stretched her paycheck in a much appreciated way. Plus her boss worked far more hours than she did, and her gatekeeper position right next to his office door, barring unwelcome interruptions, allowed him to focus on his work so he could get home at a decent hour too. Somebody in the coffee room the other day, Mulder it might have been, had asked the group milling about if they were happy with their lives. Of course, Scully had said yes right off the bat, since she was just starting her second trimester. Just wait until she had a squirming baby in her hands, demanding, and deserving, every second of her time, Kim had wanted to inform her. But then, Scully was going to have some help with that. Mulder was already overly attentive to her every pregnant craving. Kim had been doing it all by herself for over five years. When the question had swung around to her, she hadn't really known what to say. Happy was a pretty broad term. She enjoyed her job, and Emma really was a delight. Raising her bubbly, sweet daughter was the proudest accomplishment of Kimberly's life. So there were too many nights that she crashed and fell asleep on the couch, her arms full of unfolded clothes, her sink still full of dishes. So there were too many mornings that she just couldn't take another person jostling her aside on the Metro, or the last day of the month, when she balanced her checkbook and allowed herself a few deserved tears. But happy? Kim had only given a Mona Lisa-like smile to Mulder, and said sure, she was happy. Why bother anyone else with the exhausting whirling tornado that was her life? Certainly no one was volunteering to be bothered. *And that's what truly lies behind your frustration, isn't it, Kimberly?* Men didn't really look at a woman, still hanging onto to some annoying pregnancy weight, with a small child balanced on her hip, a perma-worry wrinkle between her eyebrows, and say, yeah, I wanna take that hot number to bed. But that train of thought only got her depressed, so she let it go. She'd made her bed, so to speak, and now she was lying in it. Alone. So she didn't know what to think when she spotted the enormous bouquet of flowers on her desk. It wasn't her birthday or Secretaries Day, and besides, Walter Skinner didn't give her flowers for either of those two occasions. He was usually more practical than that. One year it had been a beautiful pen set, another time a leather appointment book. Last year for her birthday, he had even taken her to lunch at a very expensive French restaurant. That hadn't gone well; she'd felt very out of place there, afraid she had dried snot on her shoulder since Emma had had the flu that whole week, and the waiter had looked at her very haughtily. But it had been such a sweet gesture on Skinner's part, and it warmed her heart that he'd gone to the effort, so she covered her discomfort as best she could. He wasn't a person who engaged in a lot of small talk, so she could see the toll it took on him to converse lightly as they ate their meals. But he was, as always, ever-so-polite to her, even after the strange lunch, asking after her daughter, remembering small details she told him. He'd even bought a card with a crisp new five-dollar bill inside for her to give to Emma when she had lost her first tooth a few months ago. And every year he insisted she take her daughter's birthday off from work, with pay. Not to mention how attentive he'd been to her during her pregnancy, she suddenly recalled, making sure she stayed off her swollen feet as much as possible during the last few months, and keeping her job open for her during her maternity leave. She'd been such a mess during the whole thing, still adjusting to the idea of raising a fatherless child, she'd been sure he was going to re-assign her to a less-stressful post. The flowers took her attention away from her rambling thoughts. As far as she knew, there wasn't anyone in the Bureau, or in any portion of her life, who would send her such a beautiful gift. Not beautiful, she amended as she looked closer, *exquisite*. Breathtaking. The colors of all the blossoms varied; there were rich, vibrant hues of purples, oranges, magentas, blues, and a smattering of brilliant yellows. A bouquet that immediately made her think of autumn, which was just around the corner. Of crisp, cool air and dried leaves crackling under her feet. Her favorite time of year. As she began walking toward it, the dazzling scent they gave off made her sigh in pleasure. She resisted the urge to bury her nose amongst the petals. Instead she dropped her purse in her bottom drawer, removed her coat and hung it on the hook beside her filing cabinet, and slowly sat down so the tops of the flowers were over her head. The vase they were in was just as expensive as the flowers, she noticed. Heavy cut glass, with a graceful swirling pattern etched into its thick side. Might even be crystal. The healthy green stems were blurred by the clear water and the glass. They would last for at least a week before wilting, her forever-practical side informed her. Kim just looked at the flowers for a long time, unable to fully wrap her mind around the concept. It took about five minutes before she even noticed the un-addressed envelope sitting next to the vase on her blotter. A heavy ivory-hued stationary, the paper felt like raw silk against her fingertips. The envelope was sealed, and there was a blank card inside. When she opened it, she didn't recognize the handwriting, but it was written in a very carefully traced looping penmanship, the likes of which she hadn't seen since grade school, when she was taught that skill by Sister Mary Catherine. Pretty women wonder where my secret lies. I'm not cute or built to suit A fashion model's size But when I start to tell them, They think I'm telling lies. I say, It's in the reach of my arms The span of my hips, The stride of my step, The curl of my lips. I'm a woman Phenomenally. Phenomenal woman, That's me. On her third reading, once she got over her awe-struck giggles, she recognized the poem. It was the first stanza of Maya Angelou's "Phenomenal Woman". One of her favorites. She couldn't remember the rest of the verses, though; it had been a long, long time since she'd had an opportunity to read poetry. She used to read it in her tub, while soaking in a hot bubble bath. A luxury she rarely allowed herself anymore. The phone rang sharply, jolting her out of her reverie. "Good morning, Assistant Director Skinner's office." "Good morning, Kim. Please let AD Skinner know the Deputy Director is calling." Her eyes shot over to his open door, but from this angle, couldn't see his desk except the outer edge. She hadn't even checked to see if he was in yet, she'd been so enraptured by the flowers. "Certainly, Grace," she told the DD's secretary. "Please hold one minute." Clicking the hold button, she scampered up to see if her boss was at his desk. To her utter embarrassment, he was, his focus directed at the report in front of him. He must have been in for a while now, she realized with dismay, since he'd already removed his suit jacket. His red tie sliced the broad expanse of his white starched shirt neatly in two. The glass of his wirerims flashed in the sunlight when he turned to look in her direction, the glare hiding any expression in his eyes. "Good morning, sir. I didn't realize you were in yet. The Deputy Director is holding on line one. Would you like me to get you some coffee while you take the call?" she asked hurriedly. She didn't want him to get angry at her for delaying an important caller. Not that he would, he never yelled at her the way everyone assumed he did. One of the things she liked best about working for Walter Skinner was how courteously he treated her. He sighed, and as his hand reached for the phone, he replied, "Good morning, Kim. Coffee would be great, thanks." She exited quickly, closing the door behind her. When she wasn't at her desk, she always made sure his domain was secure. He had so much responsibility bearing down on him, so much was expected of him. Her primary function at the Bureau was to slow down the unending tide of pressure and people so he could do his job as effectively as he did. For the most part, she was very good at that. She kept his office running as smoothly as possible. Until somebody, Scully or Mulder being the worst culprits, would burst in and ruin the calm atmosphere she worked so hard to create for him. Ignoring her desktop, she scooted over to the break room and poured two steaming mugfuls of coffee. He liked his strong, and black. She had more of a sweet tooth, so she added two Sweet'n'Lows and a splash of skim milk to her own. She was still floating from the rush of the flowers, but caffeine was always welcome, and necessary. Walking carefully back to the office, so she didn't spill, she placed hers on her desk, before knocking quietly on his door. Since the phone buttons were unlit, she knew his call was concluded, but he'd looked pretty busy with his paperwork before she'd interrupted him a few minutes ago. It only took him about three seconds to re-focus, she knew after years of working for him. His intensity was legendary in the Bureau. "Come in, Kimberly." She brought the coffee over to him, which he took from her hand, his fingers brushing hers as they exchanged the weight of the mug from her grasp to his. He usually just let her set it on the desk, so the feel of his innocuous touch was something of a shock. A tremor rippled through her, warm and strong. *Just like his hands.* Jeez, what was the matter with her? One bouquet and here she was fantasizing about impossible things. "So is it a special day? Did I forget something?" he inquired. "Sir?" "The flowers arrived soon after I came in this morning. I had the messenger leave them on your desk." Kim felt her face flush, and resisted the urge to cool it with her palm. "No, sir. It's just Monday. Um...would you happen to remember the name of the delivery service?" He smiled at her little joke, and shook his head no. Standing next to him, she could see past the glass lenses into his eyes. He had the warmest brown eyes of anyone she knew. It amused her that everyone quaked in fear of him. To be fair, Walter Skinner did have a foreboding, military- style erect stance, his massive body and drill-sergeant voice creating an invisible circle around him that screamed, 'touch me only if you're willing to die'. But if you looked at his eyes, or his face, you could see it was a fa?ade. For a man who was allegedly unemotional, the muscles of his face were almost always in motion, and gave everything he was feeling away. Kim had spent years studying him, and now could practically read him like a book. His jaw twitched when he was angry, he bit the side of his lip when he was anxious, his ears reddened when embarrassed, the lines on the sides of his mouth and between his eyebrows deepened when concerned. She rarely got to see what moved on his face when he was experiencing a positive emotion. "I'm sorry. I didn't catch it. Is there something wrong with the flowers? Do you need to contact them?" "N-no," she stuttered, slightly mortified to explain any further, "I just wanted to see if they would tell me who they're from. The card wasn't signed." His eyebrow lifted in his instantly-recognizable amused facial gesture. "Unsigned? Why, Kimberly, I think you may have a secret admirer." A secret admirer? The idea was so moving, and so preposterous, she didn't know whether to laugh or cry. She picked laugh. "I doubt that, sir. But I wish I could thank whoever sent them. They're just what I needed to boost my spirits." He looked like he was about to say something else when two lines on his phone rang at once. So they both got back to work, and the moment was soon forgotten in the flurry of the day. But every time her gaze caught sight of a blossom, or when she turned quickly in her chair and a whiff of their lovely, heady scent invaded her nostrils, she found herself foolishly smiling and thinking of his words. A secret admirer. And that was the same consensus reached by the people in the break room, as well, when the talk turned to her mystery gift-giver. Kim was rarely the center of attention, and frankly, she basked in the glow. A low-level buzz coursed through her veins all day. When the second gift appeared two weeks later, once the flowers had died and been relegated to the wastebasket, you could have knocked her over with a feather. It took her five minutes just to unwrap the bright red ribbon and thick paper from the box, her hands were shaking so badly. The tissue paper crumpled easily under her touch, and she let the box fall back onto her desk with a small surprised gasp. It was a scarf, a gorgeous silk scarf, that when she draped it around her neck, matched both the forest green of her overcoat that she hadn't taken off yet, and the color of her hair. A soft gray, with delicate swirls of red, gold and green inlaid in the fabric. It felt wonderful, cool and sensual, against her cheek. There was another blank envelope, the same stationary as the first, and the words blurred in her damp vision when she read the second stanza. I walk into a room Just as cool as you please, And to a man, The fellows stand or Fall down on their knees. Then they swarm around me, A hive of honey bees. I say, It's the fire in my eyes, And the flash of my teeth, The swing in my waist, And the joy in my feet. I'm a woman Phenomenally. Phenomenal woman, That's me. Maybe she really did have a secret admirer, she admitted. And her curiosity as to who saw her as the woman in the poem was overwhelming. So she put on her thinking cap and started to play a little detective. It had to be someone in the office, she deduced. Skinner told her, when she'd asked, that he hadn't been in the office to sign for the second package, so it had to be someone who worked here. Security was too tight around here for it to be a random person off the street. Plus she never wore her green overcoat anywhere but here. She'd paid a lot of money for it, and wasn't about to ruin it with food stains or dirt if she had it on when she and Emma ran around town on the weekends, running errands or going to the park. Her dry cleaning bills were high enough. But who? She started watching the men whom she ran into on a regular basis more closely. Mulder she immediately crossed off the list; he was so obviously crazy about Scully, and they were having a child together. Not every man bolted for the door when you told them that you were pregnant, Kim reminded herself. Mulder was the kind who stayed, unlike Emma's father. The sperm donor, she called him in her head, when she was feeling particularly snippy. But all the other agents seemed to basically ignore her, when she studied their reactions to her presence. Most didn't even know her name. She struck up a conversation with one likely candidate, Agent Johnson, but after a couple of minutes, started praying that it wasn't him. He was as dull as dishwater. When she got back to her desk, having made some excuse to extricate herself from the fourth circle of hell, she looked down at her front, and laughed. He'd been staring at her chest because she had a blob of left-over oatmeal from Emma's breakfast on her blouse. Not because he was enamored of her. Next she examined Skinner's most frequent non-Bureau visitors. The three weirdos who followed Mulder around often might be candidates. The one with the beard was sort of cute. But when she mentioned in passing the poem, his eyes had glazed over and he'd dreamily commented that some woman named Suzanne had been a phenomenal woman. So she scratched him off the list too, and didn't even bother with the other two. If they were the guy sending her presents, a simple thank-you was all she was willing to give either of them. Kim shuddered and sent a swift prayer skywards that the Smoking Man no longer came around. He hadn't been in Skinner's office since she bought her green coat, so he wasn't a possibility. And the idea of him thinking about her, in any way, shape or form, was enough to make her want to join a convent. That leathery skin and those cold, dead eyes, yuck. Not to mention the cigarette stench that reeked from his very pores. It used to take her days to air out Skinner's office after one of his visits. But his lackey might be the one, and Kim wondered what the heck she would do if it was. She remembered Krycek from his Special Agent days, and had thought he was pretty hot back then, even though she was living with the sperm donor at the time. But when he'd jumped ship, and it was clear he was not a man you'd want to introduce your child to, she'd changed her opinion about him. He'd been hanging around Skinner's office lately, ever since Mulder had been returned from his ordeal in Oregon, and when Skinner kept him waiting on her office couch, she'd looked up from her monitor to find him staring at her so intensely she got goose bumps. On the other hand, he looked that way at everyone, she told herself. Didn't mean a thing. Frustrated, she approached Holly and tried to find out if there was anyone who might have, well, a crush on her. Since Holly worked in Records, she talked to a lot more agents and staff than Kim did, and she had a finely-tuned ear for all gossip. But that awkward discussion yielded nothing; Holly hadn't heard any talk except the same speculation about her gift-giver that Kim had, and she kept attempting to shift the talk to Skinner and his personal life. Kim didn't like to talk about him to the rest of the staff. He was a private man, and she respected him too much to engage in tawdry innuendo about him. So what if he was divorced, and didn't date, as far as she knew. It wasn't anybody's business but his. Kim didn't even allow herself to entertain the thought that Walter Skinner was behind her current situation. Sure, he was a gentleman toward her, courtly almost in his demeanor, but she was a pretty integral part of his success at work. It didn't necessary follow that he had some personal feelings for her. He just knew that snapping her head off would only ruin the comfortable relationship they had. And he was far too savvy about office politics to piss off his assistant. He knew, if she was *that* kind of person, she could damage his reputation easily. A few well-placed rumors about a peccadillo or a hint of sexual harassment, and that would be that. His previous assistant, the one that only stayed about two weeks before Kim was assigned to her current post, had done just that. It had taken her six months to assuage everyone on the staff that he wasn't the man that nasty woman had implied he was. It had taken another six months beyond that before Skinner had begun to trust Kim herself. But now that he did, and had for years, working for him was one of the most enjoyable parts of her day. He didn't shove her aside, like some agents did or like the other commuters on the train, he didn't nag her about dating like her mom did. Unlike her daughter, he talked to her in full declarative sentences, and he didn't ask her to read "Green Eggs and Ham" for the millionth time before bed. The thought of him asking her to read *anything* to him in bed was both one of the most erotic, and the most ridiculous, images she'd ever depicted. Sometimes her imagination ran away from her, she chided herself. So she firmly put all of it out of her mind, and let her busy life do the thinking for her. Which was as easy as falling off a log. She and Emma went to the zoo the Saturday after she got the scarf, and Kim spent the ensuing week listening to her cheerful excited talk about how cool the pandas had been. Personally, she enjoyed the aquarium more; fish didn't squawk or roar, there were no phones ringing, or car horns bleating, or trains rushing by. It was silent except for happy chatter and the soothing sound of splashing water. But Emma thought the aquarium 'bo-ring, Mommy', so they didn't go as often as Kim would have liked. The following weekend was the one after payday, and Kim decided to splurge a bit after they ran errands all day Saturday. Usually, on Sundays, she cleaned the house, and cooked meals for the week, freezing them in small Tupperware bowls that were easy to re-heat each night when she got home from work. But this Sunday, she took Emma shopping. Not just any kind of shopping, either. To the store of all stores for a five-year-old, the grand high exalted holy Mecca of toy-dom: FAO Schwarz. She'd only taken her there a few times, and usually regretted it. Emma's 'must-have' toys were usually out of her price range. But she'd put in a lot of overtime the two weeks prior, and it showed in her checkbook. So she planned on buying her daughter anything her precious little heart desired. Kim told herself it had nothing to do with the guilt of leaving her with her grandma for so many evenings. Emma dragged her all over the store, ooh-ing and aah-ing at the dolls, the stuffed animals, the games, her grin as wide as the Grand Canyon. Kim soon got caught up in her overflowing enthusiasm. "Oh Mommy, look! A pandy bear! Like at the zoo!" Kim eyed the huge stuffed creature. The darn thing was bigger than Emma. "Just like the zoo. What would you call it, if you took it home? It has to have a name, you know." Emma pursed her lips, thinking. A deep laugh suddenly burst behind Kim's shoulder. "My goodness, she looks like you when you're lost in thought." She spun toward the low voice, her brain not accepting that it was the person who her ears told her. But it was. What on earth was Walter Skinner doing in a toy store? "Oh, hello sir. I mean, Walter," she corrected herself. He'd asked her, when they'd gone to the fancy French place, to please call him by his first name when they weren't in the office. She hadn't had an opportunity to take him up on that until this very second. "Hello, Kimberly." His eyes danced behind his wirerims as he looked down at the little girl staring open-mouthed at him. "You must be Emma. I've heard a lot about you." "You're bigger than a grizzly bear," Emma blurted out, and Kim winced. "Emma, that's not polite. Say hello to Mr. Skinner, please." To Kim's utter disbelief, Skinner laughed again and crouched down so he was eye-level with her daughter. He put out his hand to her, and Emma placed her tiny one in it, and shook it politely. Her entire fist disappeared within the palm of his hand, and Kim stifled a giggle at the sight. "Hello, Mr. Skinner, it's very nice to meet you," she said, then looked to her mother for approval. Kim nodded, and let them speak, ready to jump in when either Emma got to be too much, or Skinner ran out of things to say. Both were distinct possibilities. "It's nice to meet you too, Emma. Have you decided on a name for the bear?" She shrugged. "Maybe Andy. Andy the Pandy. But I don't want to take him home." "And why's that?" "My other animals might get mad at me. He's so big he might crush them when we had our tea party." "I think Andy would be careful not to hurt them. Big bears don't always have to be scary, especially when the big bear wants to be friends with the smaller bears," he said, smiling. Emma mulled that over, then returned his grin. "Like you?" "Just like me," he said, as he stood back up to his full height. Emma craned her head up, then giggled at him, before her attention shifted back to the panda. Kim was amazed by the entire exchange. "She's charming, Kimberly. You must be proud," he said once Emma was fully engrossed by the stuffed animals. Kim kept one eye on her, while the other tried to focus on the man addressing her. But it was hard to pay attention, especially since he wasn't wearing a suit. Today he had on a pair of khakis, and a dark-green chamois shirt, with the top two buttons undone. A little chest hair peeked out at his neck, and it sent her mind flying in all sorts of inappropriate directions. "Thank you. You handled yourself well, considering the fact I doubt you spend a lot of time with five year olds," she said with a nervous titter. What the heck was she nervous about, she wondered. He smiled in agreement. "Actually that's why I'm here. My niece's birthday is next week, and I'm at a loss as to a gift. I thought I'd put myself in the hands of professionals, begging for mercy, but the salespeople seem to be swamped at the moment." "Not surprising for a Sunday. Maybe I can help with some suggestions. How old is your niece?" she asked, laughing at his woebegone expression, when Emma came back and tugged on her arm. Kim swung her up onto her hip, as Skinner spoke to both of them. "She's five too. So I was wondering, Emma, if you could help a poor big bear find a good present to give somebody your size." And somehow, hours later, Kim found herself sitting in an ice cream parlor, sharing a hot fudge sundae with Walter Skinner. They had combed the store thoroughly, Emma often dragging Skinner by two of his fingers, to show him a 'really neat' gift. Eventually he settled on a Barbie for his niece, and Emma decided her special Sunday toy was going to be the board game Chutes and Ladders. Kim's foolish imagination kept bursting through her consciousness as she watched the two of them interact. Skinner was so serious and funny at the same time, asking Emma's advice on each toy, listening to her every word with a series of dignified nods, inspecting it carefully with her, before moving onto the next. And Emma was as enthralled by his focused attention as Kim herself was. He was just being kind, she told herself. Then he had shocked her by accepting Emma's impromptu invitation to the ice cream shop. He looked over at Emma fondly, who was resting against Kim's hip with a sleepy expression on her face. Her kid's- sized scoop of mint chocolate chip was long gone, most of which had landed either in her lap or somewhere in the vicinity of her mouth. She'd been too busy talking to Skinner to see where her spoon was headed. "Somebody looks like they're ready for a nap," he commented, as Kim shifted her arm so Emma could nestle in closer. Then his eyes scanned her own face. "Maybe two people," he amended. Kim sighed, and dug her spoon into the parfait glass between them. "Yeah, but this sundae's too good to waste. We'll go in a bit, okay, honey?" she said to her daughter, who mumbled a drowsy "okay" back. "I want to apologize to you, Kim," he said sotto voce, and she looked over at him, confused. "I don't think I realized until today how selfish it is for me to ask you to put in such long hours as you do." "That's okay, sir," she quickly responded. "I don't mind, and ah...the money comes in handy," she confessed, a little color staining her cheeks. He bit the side of his lip, in the gesture she knew from experience meant anxious. She immediately regretted making him think she didn't know how much he appreciated her. The words tumbled out before she could stop them. "I didn't mean that the way it came out. I'm not angling for a raise." "Oh, I know that. But I still think you deserve one." "Sir--" "Walter," he gently corrected her. "Walter," she repeated, "really, I'd rather you didn't. I'd just feel guilty every two weeks when payday comes. My regular raises are fine, honestly. Please don't make a fuss." He nodded, and looked hard at her all of a sudden. Kim didn't know what was the matter. "Nobody really makes a fuss over you, do they, Kimberly?" The blush came so fast to her face she actually felt dizzy. "Not really," she agreed, "but that's okay. I don't think I'd know what to do if they did." His eyebrow arched. "Is that why you get so flustered over your secret admirer?" "Maybe. It's embarrassing being the subject of everyone's discussion on breaks. But on the other hand, it's kind of nice, to know someone thinks about me once in awhile." "So are you going to keep trying to figure out who it is?" "How...how did you know I was doing that?" He laughed, and leaned back into the booth, waving his hand to indicate she should finish the last of the sundae. "Kimberly, I was a field investigator for a long time. I'm a fairly observant person." So much for being subtle about her little detective excursion, she thought with a little laugh. "Well then, Sherlock Holmes, so who do you think it is?" He chuckled. "I haven't a clue, my dear Watson." Then he got serious, his dark eyes watching her carefully behind his lenses. "But maybe the point is, who do you *want* it to be. Let the man remain a mystery, and just enjoy the attention. Besides, you might not like the person behind the gifts, and that would spoil his intent. Perhaps, whoever it is, just wants you to feel special." "You mean, you think the person doesn't care for me?" He shook his head. "No, he obviously does. Let's look at the evidence," he said in his AD Skinner tone, and Kim bit back a laugh. It sounded very out of place here. "The flowers would appear to be a general affectionate statement. And sending them to your place of work, rather than your home, says that he is marking his territory, in a way. Letting other men around you know that there is someone who thinks you're worthy of being treated well. The scarf, because it matches your coloring and coat so well, tells us that he's watched you, and he pays attention to detail. But sneaking something into the office under both of our radar indicates that he doesn't want to be found. So, in the final analysis, we could conclude that your secret admirer's true agenda might just be to encourage you to dream. To indulge in a fantasy." She waved her hand at him, and tucked a stray curl of Emma's hair behind her ear. Sweet little thing had fallen asleep right on her lap. "Who's got time for that?" "Maybe you should make the time," he said, his voice as dark and rich as the hot fudge she licked off the edge of her spoon. "Maybe he wants you to take a little time for yourself." "You're one to talk, Walter. I think *you* need a secret admirer," she scoffed. She tore her eyes away from his suddenly mesmerizing ones, and grabbed at some napkins to clean off Emma's face and overalls before the ice cream took root. A bath had not been on today's agenda, and laundry wasn't until Wednesday night. He moved so fast, and so gracefully, she didn't realize he was holding onto her forearm until she felt his fingers clamped around her bare skin. "Look at yourself, Kim," he said sternly, his jaw twitching. "You're doing three different things at the same time, and you're probably thinking about two others that you didn't have time to tackle yet." She blinked, shocked. He'd never raised his voice to her before. And he sure as hell had never touched her. "So what if I am? Is there something wrong with that?" she asked, on the verge of being offended. And inexplicably, on the brink of tears. *God, pull it together, girl. Maybe she did need a nap.* He gentled his tone and his grip as he continued. "Kim, you work yourself down to the bone. I'm...I'm just concerned about you. Please don't take it the wrong way." What other way was she supposed to take it, she thought, thoroughly frustrated. A dozen angry retorts were on the tip of her tongue, when Emma stirred against her and got her back on track. She dug through her wallet for some money, ignoring his protests to pay for dessert, and scooped her purse, a still-sleeping Emma, and their shopping bags into her arms as she rose. He stood up as she did, grasping her elbow firmly to stop her hasty escape. "Kimberly, I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to upset you." She forced herself to smile. "You didn't. I just have to take her home and really let her nap or she'll be cranky all night. Thank you for a lovely afternoon." He dropped his hand, and she turned to leave. Then she reconsidered, and faced him again. He wasn't just nibbling his lip, he was practically swallowing it whole. "You probably have a point, Walter. And I do appreciate you trying to help. I shouldn't have over-reacted. It just...touched a nerve." Then she closed her eyes, and let loose what she'd really been thinking. "I guess I was hoping that maybe my secret admirer wanted me. As a woman. I didn't tell you, or anybody really, but there's this poem that he's been sending snippets of, and..." She stopped, mortified that she was even discussing this with him. Oh God, she'd practically announced she needed to get laid. To her *boss*. When she worked up the nerve to open her eyes, he was staring at her with the most unreadable expression she'd ever seen on his face. She, who had become an expert on every unspoken need he had at work, didn't have the slightest clue what he was thinking. "A poem?" he finally said, after the longest silence of her life. "Yeah," she mumbled, squirming. "It's kind of, ah, well, sexy." After another too-long beat, his mouth widened into an enormous smile. Kim had never seen a look of pure delight on his face before. It was probably the most beautiful thing she'd ever seen. "Well, that throws my whole theory off, doesn't it? I didn't factor in a hot, lusty poem." She giggled, relieved that somehow they'd gotten past their awkward moment unscathed. She didn't like almost-fighting with him. "It's not really that hot. It's just..." *Just what? Erotic? Empowering? Passionate?* "...flattering," she chose. "Kimberly," he said, "I think I misjudged both you and your mystery man. You should probably disregard everything I said this afternoon. He most likely has very deep feelings for you." His brown irises melted into hot fudge, as he emphasized, "As a woman." When she got into work Monday, she nearly fell down onto the linoleum of the hallway in relief. Even though her brain kept telling her to be sensible, to not expect anything, her heart kept saying, "Two weeks. It's been two weeks since the last gift." She had tried very hard to ignore her heart, but it had been hopeless. And worth it. Because there was a brightly-wrapped, oddly-shaped bundle on her desk, waiting for her. Once she got it open, she was more confused than ever. A basket of toiletries? Huh? But she had to admit, this guy had great taste. The bubble bath and the soaps were from Crabtree & Evelyn, and in some of her favorite aromas. A sweetly-scented spring bouquet, and a more musky one. Sandalwood, when she looked the label. Of course, the best part was the third stanza. Men themselves have wondered What they see in me. They try so much But they can't touch My inner mystery. When I try to show them They say they still can't see. I say, It's in the arch of my back, The sun of my smile, The ride of my breasts, The grace of my style. I'm a woman Phenomenally. Phenomenal woman, That's me. She was so involved in reading, she didn't hear him come in until he was right up next to her. Kim jumped about six feet in the air when she saw a plastic hand reaching for one of the bubble baths sitting out loosely out on her desk. "What's this?" Krycek asked, his green cat's eyes drilling into hers. "Nothing. A gift," she babbled, then took a deep calming breath. "Do you have an appointment with Mr. Skinner?" His eyebrow shot up. "A gift? Someone sent you bubble bath? That's sexy as hell." He picked up the bottle and sniffed around the cap. "I bet this will smell great on you, too." She stood up, and snatched the bottle out of his hand. Suddenly she felt very dirty, and not in a good, raunchy way, either. The idea that maybe Krycek had sent the lovely gifts cast a bleak pallor over everything. An image of him standing in the store, sampling different scents while he pictured her in her bathtub, made her sick to her stomach. "Don't touch that," she spit. "Do you have an appointment or not?" His sharp eyes raked over her, and he gave her a wicked smile. "Yes I do. My, aren't you touchy this morning, Kim. Does this mean you're not going to invite me over to help scrub your back?" "Krycek, leave her alone," Skinner barked from the outer door of her office. In four fast strides, he loomed over the younger man, and quickly hustled him into his office. Skinner gave her a brief glance, then closed the door behind him without saying another word. An hour later, both men emerged from Skinner's office, and Krycek sauntered past her without speaking, thankfully. Skinner leaned against his doorway, his arms folded across his chest. He looked both concerned and tired. The lines by his mouth were very deep. "Did he say anything to you before I got here, Kim?" She shook her head and shifted her gaze to her empty blotter. She'd put away all evidence of her gift, feeling a little soiled by her mini run-in with Krycek. "No, sir." In the space of a heartbeat, she felt a warm hand on her shoulder, and her eyes followed the white cotton of his sleeve up to his face. "Then what's the matter?" he persisted. "Do you...do you think maybe he's been sending the gifts?" Skinner dropped his hand, and folded his arms back up. "What makes you think so?" "I don't know. He looks at me strangely sometimes, and well, he was here lurking around. You and I weren't. He could have sneaked in and left them here for me." By the tight look on his face, Kim knew he was taking her anxiety seriously. "I doubt it," he replied, the words coming out slowly through his clenched jaw. "Krycek doesn't strike me as someone who cares very much about anyone except himself. I've completely misread his character if he's capable of doing anything that's brought such a string of delighted smiles to your face in the last few weeks." She gave a valiant effort at one just because he was being so sweet, but fell far short of her mark. "I hope your analysis is correct, sir." "May I ask what was in today's gift?" he inquired politely. "Toiletries. Bubble bath and soaps and stuff." He pondered that for a minute, frowning. It was so weird, but for a second there, Kim got the impression that he was just a tiny bit...jealous? Impossible, she decided. "It's actually a very nice gift, from whomever the source. I'm a big fan of bubble baths," she said hurriedly, determined not to think about Alex Krycek again. He just couldn't be her secret admirer. She was going to take Walter's advice from yesterday and not try to uncover his identity anymore. She was just going to let it be whomever she chose it to be. Skinner peered into her face carefully, then smiled. "I hope you enjoy it then." And enjoy it she did. A few days later, Friday night to be exact, after she'd managed to get in and out of work on time, after she'd cleaned up after dinner, and long after she put Emma down for the night, Kim drew herself a nice, hot bath. She selected the spring bouquet bath oil, and hunted unsuccessfully for her Maya Angelou book while the water ran. Faintly annoyed when she couldn't find it, she instead took the three cards out of her dresser drawer and took them with her into the bathtub. The stupid sperm donor must have swiped her book when he packed up and moved out; now that she thought about it, she hadn't read the poem since before Emma was born. Kim let the water and the heat and the bubbles surround her until she felt loose-limbed and relaxed from the luxuriousness of it all. When she was good and ready, she picked up each card, in order received, and savored each individual line. Indulging an instinct, she sniffed at the paper. She didn't recognize the scent, but it was tantalizing. Clean and clear, like rain. She imagined a man's large hand, holding the black pen loosely, the edge of his palm raised over the paper, brushing against it occasionally as he copied this lovely, alluring poem. To her. Thinking of her with every stroke of his...pen. She let the cards fall to the floor, and ran her fingers through the bubbles, then below, along the contours of her body, imagining that same man, with a wide chest and an even wider smile, wrapping his strong arms around her in the tub. Touching her, kissing her, whispering sweet nothings in her ear as he made slow, passionate love to her. Kim tipped her head back against the cool enamel of the tub and sighed with pleasure. It was the last enjoyable moment she experienced for a week. Her car broke down on Saturday, stranding her and Emma in the parking lot of the supermarket. When she got to the mechanic's where she'd had it towed, the estimate for repairs nearly depleted half her savings account. But no car wasn't an option, so she agreed, after negotiating only a pittance off the price. Sunday brought more disasters. She burned her hand while pulling the lasagna out of the oven, Emma scraped her knee badly while playing hopscotch, and her mom came down with a nasty head cold. So she re- organized her schedule for the week so she could get out of the office on time each night. Pity, too, because she had hoped the overtime would give her a head start on replenishing her savings. And the entire week at the office was no better. Skinner was out of town for most of it, mopping up some mess Mulder had created down in Florida. She could hear the tightly reined-in strain in his voice every time he called in for messages. Her computer crashed, twice, and the tech guy she called couldn't retrieve the reports she'd been working on, so she had to re-type all of them. The corner of her desk decided to become a pantyhose magnet, shredding four pairs of them in the space of two days. All in all, she had never been so happy to see Friday appear in her life. CONTINUED IN PART 2
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